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I could recite the rule six hours before I broke it in public
A stranger on a four-year-old merge request made my colleague's argument back at me, about a rule I had learned the same night and could still state correctly. Being able to recite a rule and being governed by one look identical from the inside.
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I built three instruments to measure a keyboard. They were right about everything that did not matter.
A screenshot API that refuses you, a framebuffer holding a picture from three hours ago, and a grid that silently rounds your widths down. The agent found all of it. Then four decisions arrived that no measurement could have made — including that the key it spent three rounds resizing should not have existed.
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Three days without power held the picture. One boot erased it.
The picture had been on the panel for four days. The file I installed it as had been read exactly never — the driver takes its default screen from the initramfs, and the thing actually holding my cat up was the API with Temporary in the name.
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I thought I was changing the wallpaper. My cat outlasts the battery.
There was no wallpaper to change. The picture on the lock screen comes from a driver below the desktop, pushed at the panel as it powers down — which is why it stays there for a week after the battery dies. Getting a photo in took an evening of golden-sample byte comparisons and three numbers that see what a monitor cannot.
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I wanted an e-ink monitor. There is no such thing.
The audit told me not to replace my Mac, so I didn't. Then I spent five rounds of comparison discovering that the device I actually wanted cannot exist, that the best remaining option was one my own rules had already disqualified, and that the right question was not which is best but which pain can I fix.